Finding Me..

on stilts

2009-10-13T10:31:00.000-07:00

While leafing through the latest fashion magazine (yes i still waste my precious salary to buy those!) and surfing the much loved sartorial blog, one wonders....about all these uber fashionable, and ultra cool women from across the globe - who're in great jobs, are quite obviously very creative (given the lack of effort it takes for them to make a gorgeous ensemble seem like they just threw it on - and maybe they did!), and always wearing the most desirable shoes!!

But how pray tell...does a gorgeous woman with a fetish for good looking killer heels, spend her time walking around town and doing her jobs for the day? (and they do tend tend to walk way more than we do in India). And yet she looks like a million bucks!

been dying to get my gorgeousmost nine west shoes out to wear!!
Yes i'm addicted to street fashion!

My immortal....

2008-10-14T09:15:00.000-07:00

It was a present from one of my uncles, when I was a kid. He said it would inspire me to write poetry, but I was only 15, and I thought it boring. But now I carry this book with me all the time. It's always in my bag, so it goes with me everywhere, and it never disappoints me. A little peek through its pages, and I find myself calmed. Today in a moment of much panic and anxiety on many accounts I found this......

.......A prayer, a hymn, a song of praise.....to a god, to a love, to a soul, to the self......from the heart of one in a search.....and a longing for the essence of all that is supreme and immortal.

I sit on the grass and gaze upon the sky and dream of the sudden splendour of thy coming - all the lights ablaze, golden pennons flying over thy car, and they at the roadside standing agape, when they see thee come down from thy seat to raise me from the dust, and set at thy side this ragged beggar girl - a tremble with shame and pride, like a creeper in summer breeze.

But time glides on and still no sign of the wheels of thy chariot. Many a procession passes by, with noise and shouts and glamour of glory. Is it only thou who would stand in the shadows silent and behind them all? And only I who should wait and weep and wear out my heart in vain longing?

[A verse from the much celebrated GITANJALI by Rabindranath Tagore]

2008-05-12T05:07:00.001-07:00

hello there folks...

In keeping with the idea that every blog must represent a particular thought/ idea.. and understanding that I'm into more than one other things.. food being one of those others.. i'm gonna be starting a foodie type blog sooner than soon!

oh n i'm no longer on twitter...which explains why the li'l tweet thing-a-majig has been taken off.

watch this space to know about the food blog.

Until the end of time

2008-05-05T04:42:00.000-07:00

I will love you
Till the end of time

Write love songs to you
Till the words don't rhyme

Pray to you
for forgiveness, for i've sinned

Cry in yearning to you
and scream,give me back, what has once been

Weep tears
Until you hear me break

Obsess about you
Like a freak

Dream dreams of you
and I, till you're not really mine

I will love you
Till the end of time

An Equal Music

2008-04-30T22:20:00.000-07:00

Perhaps this could have stayed unstated.

Had our words turned to other things

In the grey park, the rain abated,

Life would have quickened other strings.

I list your gifts in this creation:

Pen, paper, ink and inspiration,

Peace to the heart with touch or word,

Ease to the soul with note and chord.

How did that walk, those winter hours,

Occasion this? No lightning came;

Nor did I sense, when touched by flame,

Our story lit with borrowed powers -

Rather, by what our spirits burned,

Embered in words, to us returned.

-- Vikram Seth

(Epigraph at the beginning of the book I started reading last evening. An Equal Music, by Vikram Seth)

Back in the day

2008-04-05T00:00:00.000-07:00

A press conference took me to the Oberoi and I was driving back home, when i crossed my old college campus. You see there was a road that led to our college ('our' because friends were a big thing, and you stuck to your group of pals and so you were the 'group' and the 'group' was you) from a round about at the main road right off the Oberoi hotel at Nizamuddin East. And i couldn't get myself to drive off the round about without taking that turn inwards. It was as though by default that my car just turned towards college.

It was only when i had driven a good distance into the road that i realised what i had done, and then i remembered that the place wasn't even the college campus anymore. It had to be vacated the year we passed out due to issues with the Municipal corporation. I remember, we were so proud to have spent all three years of our course there, hahaha we were the lucky lot.

So just for the heck of it... I drove on. Went down to the very gate, and got out of my car and peered in, smiled to myself, shook my head at all the crazy, stupid and typical things "we" did there, walked back to my car and went back home. and while driving back home the whole time thinking back... thinking to myself, "oh no i actually did that?!".. and then after another thought.."Shoot! What was i thinking!"... and "oops, i don't know what zone i was in!"

I reached home, complaining to myself how everybody had just decided to move on, only to realise i had just been too caught up with my own life as well.

This evening i'm planning on calling up people from the "group" and saying something that goes," hey! we don't catch up often enough! let's make plans!"

Beware y'all!

What i do when work won't happen...

2008-03-27T05:27:00.000-07:00

....I sit in office and finish a poem I'd started long ago....

The Little White Ghost

2008-01-22T05:45:00.000-08:00

In the night
The sky screams
Lightning and thunder.
A lone shadow,
She sits under
The light post.
Skin so pale
The little white ghost.
She's cold tonight.
Scared,
Of her own reflection.
No one to hold tonight
None cared,
There's no affection.
The hatred
Has torn her.
But little does she know
That he,
Is just round the corner.

On the frigid seat
Under the burning light post
She cries.
Silver tears
Flow down the ivory cheeks.
She tries,
To unknow
The love she lost.
It's her cold heart
He seeks.
So at this ghostly hour,
He roams
The lonely streets.
As he draws close
Her heart glows,
Warmer.
But little does she know
That love
Has just turned the corner

The cold lifts
the dark begins to dissolve
she shifts,
gets up
from the haunted seat
and then frail as a flower,
she falls to her knees.
He finds her lone figure
bent on the cold, wet street.
He lifts her up
their eyes meet.
Holds her against
his breast.
He eases her pain,
puts her troubled tangled
soul to rest.
Without a soul to see
and before anyone could warn her
Love took the Little ghost again
just around the corner.

I'm walkin on sunshine!

2008-01-21T06:37:00.000-08:00

So this weekend a friend of mine from outta town paid me a little visit. He was in town for a total of 12 hours i.e. from 5pm in the evening to 5 am in the morning; and it was my job to ensure that he was able to "pao khup" (read: have a great time) while he was around.

Anyway the evening was planned, and just as plans have, it nothing worked out. We ended up doing things that were the complete opposite of what we had charted out for the night. But that was the 'khuppi' bit!

You see there's plans that go haywire and you're like fuck the world's coming to an end! and then there are plans that go all bad and you go fuck! (another time) this is so much better than what i'd had thought out!

Now coming down to the interesting bits!

For one, we stayed up all night (as do most people when pao-ing khup with friends). However the driving force for us to do this was so that we weren't late to leave the house to get him to the airport! And what do you know when it was the said time to put on the shoes and finally head on airportwards we were suddenly sleepy as hell!

Dragged our behinds out and onto the highway that led to the destination... and i saw the most ghostly moon I have ever seen! It was enchanting! horrific! . It was full moon night last night i found out! So bewitching was the sight of the moon playing hide and seek with the clouds at 5:40 am in the morning I just couldn't keep my eyes on the road.

After dropping my friend and ensuring he was safely inside the airport i headed on homewards, or at least that was the plan.... or not!

I passed the Bangla Sahib gurdwara on my way back home, and it was as though something just pulled me towards it. I could hear the raagis singing and it was so soothing. So i parked my car in the not usually this empty parking lot at the gurdwara, and stepped in. The morning chill seeping into my whole being, but i couldn't have cared, barefoot I just walked around the whole gurdwara, my head bowed, it was as if some force was permiating my skin, upwards, from my feet and spreading all over me just washing me off all the hyperactivity of the previous night. I saw the first streaks of bright orange in the midnight blue, as a crazy and funfilled night silently metmorphosed into the drill that was another week.When I left the gurdwara, there were tears in my eyes and i felt a sort of calm inside my heart.

I drove back home all quiet, and thoughtful. As i crossed over from Delhi to NOIDA on the expressway, i saw the city wake up to a new day.

When love is in the air...

2008-01-17T22:52:00.001-08:00

(back on popular demand)

and i'm single! It's not such a celebratory feeling! For the past month or so, it just seems to me like everyone around me has been going from single to double, or has at least been having close encounters with people of the, ahem, "opposite sex". But might I add that all such efforts on my part have ended in vain! and i'm not talking about the stupid "oh i'm in love in a minute and out of it the next" type of thing. I mean the real thing. That kind that people call you up to shed tears about!! Now for a single woman in a big city, there isn't a more sad thing in life than not being able to get someone. and more so when you know that there couldn't possibly be anything wrong/missing with what you're bringing to the table. However love, as we know it, seems to ellude. Of course there's that guy sitting on the table next to mine and he's looking over trying to see if i'm actually alone or waiting for someone, trying to see if there isn't a possibility that today might prove to be his lucky day. then there was that oh so cute guy who was oh so cute, and had an oh so cute (and just outta school) girlfriend in tow! "what is wrong with the world today.. why do they want to date chics half their age!?" and then there are the advantages... which seem to be staring me in the face now that most of my female companions are seeing someone or the other. well for one you always have someone to offer to take over the wheel (and even offer to drive you all the way back home sometimes), and then there's always some motivation for you to always be looking well groomed et al, and then there's always a someone to have your coffee with, to share details of business plans, someone else to plan a dinner or lunch or evening out. someone else to remind you of the little things you know you're bound to forget, and someone to always appreciate that you always remember the things that you tend to! the downside though as i have come to observe is that you have to constantly deal with accomodating someone else's needs, demands, and requirements into your own scheme of things. But isn't that the reason why two people get together in the first place, because they like to accomodate (read: allow) someone into their lives... so completely. well love's mysteries lie for me to unfold and discover alone for now (quite to my changrin) but i'm workin on it!!

oh how you'd always find me

2008-01-17T09:00:00.000-08:00

Its dark so dark

and yet it finds me!

a light shone,

so stark,

your love, it blinds me!

Takes me by surprise!

Sweet memories,

as i close my eyes,

they remind me!

Take me back in time

to those days when you

stood behind me!
Those days
that you've been
Strong.
All those days when

I'd been wrong.

Those days were dark
so dark
and yet it'd find me!

a light would shine,

so stark,

your love, would blind me!

new year (re)solutions!

2008-01-09T10:06:00.000-08:00

Dunno if anyone here read the newspaper 'MINT', but i really like it for it's objectivity and also for the fact that they have some interesting reads packed into a few pages.

That said, this post is about the "mint lounge" (that's their lifestyle section) special edition that came out on 5th January 2008. And it has to do with a 100 interesting things to do in 2008. It's given me a little inspiration to draw up my own little list.

You see in our everyday fight to be successfull and fulfill our dreams and achieve our goals and be this and be that.. we often forget all about relaxing and, to state the cliche "take a backseat". So this year (and for some reason i feel extremely lucky) I've put down a few of those things that i'd really really like to do.

Some of these things have come straight from the list in mint, but i guess i didn't know these things existed before i read that article!! It's kinda nice to see that i have so much that i want to do and see this year... gives me more to work for and then look forward to.

Cheers to y'all! And a 'aapy noo ear!

[Update]: a fellow blogger PG is already on the move... he's got a trip all planned out... and i'm looking forward to when you'll be in delhi man! Nothing like a good vacation to kickstart a new year eh!? (wink wink)

Dream a li'l dream...

2007-12-17T04:10:00.000-08:00

The inspiration for this post comes from something I'd posted earlier. 'Cause I find myself on crossroads again... however friends and family never disappoint and help and motivation is always a phone call away.....

The song plays on the home theatre system [and I've only recently learnt to manipulate bass settings] while i type away on the computer.

And I'm working on my dream.
And I'm working on making my dream a reality.
And nothing has ever been more fulfilling.

Trying to see the point of things. Fighting. Arguing with family. Question marks. Endless discussion. Screaming. Screaming at myself. Frantic phone calls. Panic. Directionless. Wake up Japna! Talking to myself. Introspection.

In the car. On the phone. While walking in the park. During bed tea. At Barista. On the treadmill. With music. On the balcony. At the restaurant. Over coffee. When sleep won't come. When reading. Without music. Over alcohol. When sleep finally came. Through this cold [sneezes]

Endless Introspection...

It's all worth it!
Worth knowing that this "idea" that has irritated my system for two years, is finally coming about. I have been overcome with a feverish drive. And I'm willing to go it all....

Just to see the magic unfold.

Have you ever had a dream that fills your heart? That one thing you really want to see happen. That thing that puts a faraway look in your eyes! If you don't I suggest you pack up all your passions and set yourself on this ride! Set about to do that one thing that gives you that ultimate rush! You'll see how happy it makes you!

Dream a li'l dream...

It's Liberating!!

[Update] the gapingvoid talks about how to be creative when opening up that business.. have a dekho

Please to check out also....

2007-12-04T07:18:00.001-08:00

New entrants to my list...

Bleep Bleep Bleep
Mytravels
Splash

In Loving Memory...............

2007-12-02T03:58:00.000-08:00

...of love...

They say alot can happen over coffee...

2007-11-30T01:59:00.000-08:00

I love to sit alone,
the solitude helps me think better.

I love to read,
the thoughts of others give me perspective.

I love to sit with my feet dangling in the air,
the motion means I'm always on the move.

I love to sing,
the high notes are the high points of the day.

I love to drink,
the warmth, makes my heart glow - bright red.

I love to draw,
the strokes of my pencil talk to me in a secret language.

I love to drive,
the winding road is like my life.

i love to love,
there's no I, just 'us'.

'nuf said about me,
let's talk about you now~~

Big Love!

2007-11-14T01:47:00.001-08:00

[Courtesy Hugh Mcleod, he's a genius!! love his work!!]

"I believe that there's always that one person out there for everybody. You just gotta go through the bastards first."

Haaah!! Now i feel much better about the whole dating-shmating et al!!

PS: If you like the cartoon you should check out Hugh's wine labels for Valentines day... they're quite a crack!

When I miss you...

2007-11-01T06:40:00.000-07:00

I could never take chances. Not with my trust anyway.
Not after a certain point in my life.
There were too many people who disappointed.
I'm not saying they didn't try.
Maybe they didn't go all the way....with everything that was there to give.
In the end they all seem the same.

False promises. Hollow laughter. Shallow tears. Eyes that lied.
Fake. Liar.Fake.Liar. Fake. AAAaaah! all the same!

I could never take my chances. Not with love anyway.
Not after a certain point in my life.
There was that one whom i disappointed.
I'm not saying I didn't try.
Maybe I didn't go all the way....with everything i had to lose.
In the end it all came down to the same.

Broken promises. Memories of the laughter. Tears that i still cry. Eyes that still wait.
Run away. Fall deep. Run far away. Fall deeper in love. RUN AWAY from it!!

I couldn't take my chances, so it all came down in the end.

At 5 am...

2007-10-13T12:14:00.000-07:00

He sits there
at 5 am.
Head bowed in shame
and self loathing.
He sits there
brooding.
The air here
smells of it.
He lights her
up, she turns scarlet.
Presses his lips
to hers, and then
he'll wait
for her slow poison.
It'll take
him to oblivion.
Every kiss, every caress,
numbs
him, she succumbs
to him.
She cures his lonliness.
He'll consume her
reduce her
to nothingness.
Take her,
emotionless.
Without
pity, or sorrow,
remorse or doubt
or bother.
And when he's
done with her,
He'll light another.

An angel came visiting, last night...

2007-07-05T07:39:00.000-07:00

The 11:45 show..

2007-05-10T21:57:00.000-07:00

There's something about going to a late night movie with friends that is just totally cool!

hehehehe! (i know you've done that and totally loved it!)

And if it's a horror one, you had it.

And then if you have to be the one driving back home at 2 am in the morning, you're done and over with.

And if there's beggars on the road that totally remind of the s**t you saw in the movie, you'll be out cold in no time.

But there's something truly warming about a nice cuppa with friends no matter what the time of day or night.

I'm willing to brave many a horror movies, and many a creepy roads.....for another 11:45...cheers!

I promise...

2007-04-30T09:18:00.000-07:00

There's that place where you retreat to,
that place where you can be you,
that place that makes you feel so warm,
that place where you can be alone,
that place that not many have known,
that place has seen you through your life,
that place has seen you through your time,
that place is dark, and yet so bright,
that spring morning, that wintry night
that soft smile, that hid the tears,
that place where only you can hear,
that stuff that goes on deep inside,
that place where you split open wide,
that place is mine, and i will keep it,
just what it's been,
my little secret.

Comfort in my Soul!

2006-11-19T10:07:00.000-08:00

Nothing like an old pair of chappals to get you through the day!

Winter Blossoms!

2006-10-30T11:18:00.000-08:00

Nothing like flowers to wake you up to a bright morning when winter's just about there. You know the day is warm and sunny, and you step out of bed.....and ola!!

Mom put these on the table and they really made my morning!

OF MELAS AND CELEBRATIONS!

2006-10-20T04:20:00.000-07:00

That's Ramji after his return from lanka...with Sita, Lakshman and Bharat. This particular instance is called 'Bharat Milap' and it was the concluding day of the Ram Leela!
The sheer magnanimity of this mela that I attended was amazing to me!
The festivity in the atmosphere....the colour..the happiness..it was al beautiful. seeing as how we'd never been to one of these melas before...it was definitely something i'll remember for always! There was SOOOO much to eat! from your regular food to stalls for just about everything that we get on the roadside...all those things that we Indians are so crazy about! and trust me there was some very innovative stuff there!!! Have you ever had ice cream that comes straight out of the fruit...?>>>

And that's how it was served!>>>>

Of Melas and Celebrations PART II

2006-10-20T04:09:00.000-07:00

It's that time of the year again...to see the sky all lit up! and to smile in wonderment....when everyone around you has found a reason to celebrate, it's quite difficult to stay glum. And so the camera gets clicking...

On the Highway II

2006-09-17T11:49:00.000-07:00

The Highway talks of green pastures..
Of blue skies...the sun shining bright!
And of a horizon of opportunity!

Fighter!!

2006-09-08T01:02:00.000-07:00

When one is has decided, one fights.
When one is focused, one fights.
When one doesn't wanna let go, one fights.
When one is in pain, one fights.
When one is alone, one fights.
When one wants to stand up, one fights.
When one is a dreamer, one fights.
When one is a friend, one fights.
When one wishes for it to come true, one fights.
When one is at the bottom, one fights.
When one is at the top, one fights.
When there's no way but that way, one fights.
When one is heart broken, one fights.
When one is in love, one fights.
When one wants to live, one fights.

I've fought.

The sun sets....

2006-06-29T10:33:00.000-07:00

Another day....another sunset! It was almost 6:30 and it had just stopped raining! While I discussed the day's happenings over the phone animatedly, I discovered that the window wasn't blue or grey.....it was as bright as it looks..... so i picked up my camera and clicked away, while someone complained over the phone that the camera was eating away at quality time! "I can still hear it beeping!" hehehe!

Candlelit evening...

2006-06-18T07:23:00.000-07:00

An evening out over a candlelit dinner and some discussion. A celebration of being there, of making life difficult for each other, of anger and tears, and of being family. To happy times ahead!! CHEERS!

Closed Doors!!

2006-06-01T09:42:00.000-07:00

There's time. There's introspection. There's depth. There's a search. There's a closed door. Was it just closed on me......or is it waiting to be opened?

It's that time, when i'm free....with not much on my head except dumb exams. So I look within. And find many a road. I find that there are question marks. There are times when I have closed my doors to something, to someone. These were times when I have run away. Escaped. When anything and anybody has been shut out. When I've wet my pillows...when i've smashed that precious crystal vase...when i've wrecked my room...when i've banged my doors...CLOSED.

There have been other times...These were times when i was left out. Not told. Not been part of. Those times left many questions unanswered. But this wasn't my doing!! It was the time when nothing was shared, and a weird loneliness, of not belonging came in. The times when I knew something was happening. But I couldn't have known what....only because when I wanted to help, to hold, to support....the doors had been shut...CLOSED.

And now there is opportunity....just like many other times. I've trudged a path this time. I've travelled. I've toiled. Sleepless nights. Anxiety. Paranoia. It's a decision. One that I have to make myself. And I'll be responsible for it. I reach out... as the something on the other side beckons. The heart beats faster. A chill. The excitement of something new, of unchartered territory. The door that was closed....now awaits, to be OPENED!

On the highway..

2006-04-05T11:38:00.000-07:00

There's something about being on the highway, that just forces one to ponder life. Maybe it's the fact that the scenery is just going past so soon, that you just want to give your present scenario a thought. You want to stop and think. I have had the luck of being on the highway for three consecutive weekends, and you have no idea how things have changed over the two weeks in between!

Pondering life left aside, it may just have something to do with being close to nature. You sit in the car and stare out the window. You watch the fields turn from yellow to green and back. I look for shapes in clouds, and how they must be talking to each other.Somethings just bring out the child in you, and there's nothing like being on the highway. Makes you forget, makes you want to play, makes you want to smile.

Yes, beig on the highway helps you smile. A bird that flew by. Trees that should've been photographed, a river the water of which should've been felt, the wind that should set your hair askew, a sunset that should've been shared.

One can really dream when one is on the highway. You daydream about squeezing the life out of someone, you plan, and you see your plans all coming into place. You worry about how it'll all work out. You see things working out the way you want them. You smile. You feel smug.

Being on the highway also helps ease the pain. Helps you to think about yourself first. Helps you not to be pretentious. Not to be strong. Helps you cry. Somehow the tears just seem to flow naturally when you're looking out the window, and the air is blowing against your face.

Being on the highway makes you miss things. Miss the ones you've left alone in battle. Miss those that didn't want you to go in the first place. Miss the one's that make it hell for you. Miss all that you wanted to escape in the first place. Makes you want to go back after a while.

Being on the highway's a lesson, you learn more about yourself. You speed on, just like life does. But you know when it gets too much, you'll hit this road again!

Best Friends...

2006-03-27T09:02:00.000-08:00

Have you ever had that one person in your life, whom you can tell just about anything under the sun? Have there been these times spent when noone could possibly have known better what you really want to do?

Have there been these times when you go on and do the weird things that you do, but nobody else can know because she's just about as weird as you?

Walking in the rain, while you sing songs and walk through the law department of your university, checking out guys sheepishly while you know you're anything but sheepish, sipping a frappe in the biting cold, and driving halfway across town to meet up one sunday morning for breakfast (and across two states, more recently). Have you ever had someone to do completely crazy things with you?

Sharing the lowest, lonliest and most challenging times with each other. Knowing how depressing the hospital ward can be. Knowing it's a heartbreak she's suffering, and knowing she'll get over it. Always looking at the kinkier side of the things together, and sitting together and bitching about the guy that just left. Having excited conversations about the guy in the closet. Have you had someone to share moments like this with?

Not talking to each other for ages altogether. Not knowing what's really going on. But one phone call and you knew you were always around. It's as if you never spent any time apart. No change. You're both still the same people (though life may have forced a little change). Have you ever been someone's alter- ego?

She's moving into town!!

Have you ever planned someone's arrival with so much excitement. And been so anxious to be together again.

Guess there are just some things which only best friends are meant for.
MISS YOU. COME SOON!!

"Hold that thought!"

2006-03-11T10:10:00.000-08:00

I've wanted to do this one for a while now. But I wanted also, to specially take time out to put this down.

So things haven't been all smooth sailing off late. But in the midst of all this, you're so whiney, and so overcome with grief, that there are times when you forget all about your 'thank you's'.

You tend to overlook those coffees that get you warm, right down to your heart. And the conversation that accompany's it. Those shared dreams and making big plans. Peppered with a little mischief. You can't help but marvel what a coffee can do to one's mood.

Of the many things that go unnoticed, are those really late night, really long phone calls. Somebody telling you that your tears are not worth it. " Good night, sleeptight, don't let the bed bugs bite!"

You forget about that constant vigilante. The one who knows you like no one else. She's decided not to 'intrude', to step aside, but you know that she's watching from the sidelines, from far away, with comfort in her eyes, and tender love on offer.

Those moments, that go incomplete because someone's not around. That once when the weather's really fine, or you've had a bad day, or a good one. That time when you want to be comforted. When you really want to give someone a big bear hug.

'Hold that thought!' , someone told me, and you must always put it down so you never forget.

Just wanted to be there!!

2006-03-05T06:12:00.000-08:00

So it's been one of those when you wake up in the morning, looking forward to a good day, but everything is going wrong. You look around you and everyone's either ill, or sad, or depressed, or breaking up.

Look into the mirror and join the gang.

You try to be sweet, you try to help out, but it's not welcome, and everyone's ready to bite back. You want to be there, for those who're going through a trying time, but they'll go one step further and shut you out. So you feel in the end, like you're intruding, like you're not meant to know, or help. I wonder if it's the easier way out to act like the snob and to act as if everyone who tries to be comforting, just doesn't matter enough. To behave as though nothing or nobody around you, could interest you enough.

As if that's not enough, you get all weird and possessive, and even throw a tantrum. when you look back, you realise it was completely uncalled for, and you'd got unnecessarily 'fired up', but that's not like you, you tell yourself.

I'm sure everybody has their explanations and all that, but stuff it for now guys.... and then they'll go all the way and tell you they adore you for being this sweet and bearing it with a grin.

But what is it about friends, that never let's you stay angry for too long. And finally you smile when you think about the goofy things you're always doing together....so you just want to forget being angry and complaining and all, and continue trying to be there, just waiting for that once when they'll finally come around and say i really wanted to talk to you but couldn't.

"yeah! we can do it!...we can do it! together it's just you n me....." (i'm singing)